I feel pressure to have many, many friend, though I hate the upkeep, especially with people I don't like that much. I feel that when I don't want to be friends with someone, it's my fault; when they don't want to be friends with me, it's my fault. I've always done something wrong. I don't have fun on outings with a lot of people I only sort of like; but I feel that it's my fault I don't like them more, my fault I'm not having more fun, and that if I wasn't so wrong it would be better, it would be right.